forget julie andrews

here are my favorite things (of Christmas)
10. those good meatballs that you cook in a crock pot
9. the sales after Christmas
8. Fa lalala lifetime
7. Glitter
6. my new GPS
5. my new chi hair dryer
4. my family being in good health
3. my Gucci
2. Brownies left for Santa, i get to eat
1. the shit being over. this holiday last for damn ever!!!

so today i decided to organize and clean my life so i started washing clothes at 12 30 this morning and it in now 145 in the morning and i'm still washing. i hate washing clothes, because you have to fold them and put them up. i need a maid. Gucci's butt is liking better i put some neosporian on it. and i'm getting FAT. i have got to stop eating. and speaking of eating. krystals has theses new spicy waffle fries. they are the junk. you gotta try them

joanie and the baby

so i went to macon today to see my friend joanie she is in the hospital because she is pregnant. she is doing great though.



i also ate at this new greek deli. it was pretty good. morgan i think i saw your brother there with some friends....not conner....your other brother.


as i get older i begin to realize that christmas, as we know it, is for children. i no longer find the magic in it any more, i don't know if that is sad or if i'm just growing up.


My fish have ick! it is some sort of fish fungus. i bought some stuff at wally world for it but now my water is green, i dont' think that is supposed to happen.


i'm so glad school is over for the semester...nest semester i got out of teaching at the middle school by agreeing to teach ethnic music. i dont' know what that is but i'm gonna find out over the break.


Gucci has fleas....i know right? i woke up this morning and there they were and he had chewed a 3 inch by 4 inch patch of hair off his back he is now bald. it's not cute.

Let's try for a minute to take the religious conservatives at their word and define marriage as the Bible does. Shall we look to Abraham, the great patriarch, who slept with his servant when he discovered his beloved wife Sarah was infertile? Or to Jacob, who fathered children with four different women (two sisters and their servants)? Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon and the kings of Judah and Israel—all these fathers and heroes were polygamists. The New Testament model of marriage is hardly better. Jesus himself was single and preached an indifference to earthly attachments—especially family. The apostle Paul (also single) regarded marriage as an act of last resort for those unable to contain their animal lust. "It is better to marry than to burn with passion," says the apostle, in one of the most lukewarm endorsements of a treasured institution ever uttered. Would any contemporary heterosexual married couple—who likely woke up on their wedding day harboring some optimistic and newfangled ideas about gender equality and romantic love—turn to the Bible as a how-to script?
Of course not, yet the religious opponents of gay marriage would have it be so.

The battle over gay marriage has been waged for more than a decade, but within the last six months—since California legalized gay marriage and then, with a ballot initiative in November, amended its Constitution to prohibit it—the debate has grown into a full-scale war, with religious-rhetoric slinging to match. Not since 1860, when the country's pulpits were full of preachers pronouncing on slavery, pro and con, has one of our basic social (and economic) institutions been so subject to biblical scrutiny. But whereas in the Civil War the traditionalists had their James Henley Thornwell—and the advocates for change, their Henry Ward Beecher—this time the sides are unevenly matched. All the religious rhetoric, it seems, has been on the side of the gay-marriage opponents, who use Scripture as the foundation for their objections.
The argument goes something like this statement, which the Rev. Richard A. Hunter, a United Methodist minister, gave to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution in June: "The Bible and Jesus define marriage as between one man and one woman. The church cannot condone or bless same-sex marriages because this stands in opposition to Scripture and our tradition."
To which there are two obvious responses: First, while the Bible and Jesus say many important things about love and family, neither explicitly defines marriage as between one man and one woman. And second, as the examples above illustrate, no sensible modern person wants marriage—theirs or anyone else's —to look in its particulars anything like what the Bible describes. "Marriage" in America refers to two separate things, a religious institution and a civil one, though it is most often enacted as a messy conflation of the two. As a civil institution, marriage offers practical benefits to both partners: contractual rights having to do with taxes; insurance; the care and custody of children; visitation rights; and inheritance. As a religious institution, marriage offers something else: a commitment of both partners before God to love, honor and cherish each other—in sickness and in health, for richer and poorer—in accordance with God's will. In a religious marriage, two people promise to take care of each other, profoundly, the way they believe God cares for them. Biblical literalists will disagree, but the Bible is a living document, powerful for more than 2,000 years because its truths speak to us even as we change through history. In that light, Scripture gives us no good reason why gays and lesbians should not be (civilly and religiously) married—and a number of excellent reasons why they should.
In the Old Testament, the concept of family is fundamental, but examples of what social conservatives would call "the traditional family" are scarcely to be found. Marriage was critical to the passing along of tradition and history, as well as to maintaining the Jews' precious and fragile monotheism. But as the Barnard University Bible scholar Alan Segal puts it, the arrangement was between "one man and as many women as he could pay for." Social conservatives point to Adam and Eve as evidence for their one man, one woman argument—in particular, this verse from Genesis: "Therefore shall a man leave his mother and father, and shall cleave unto his wife, and they shall be one flesh." But as Segal says, if you believe that the Bible was written by men and not handed down in its leather bindings by God, then that verse was written by people for whom polygamy was the way of the world. (The fact that homosexual couples cannot procreate has also been raised as a biblical objection, for didn't God say, "Be fruitful and multiply"? But the Bible authors could never have imagined the brave new world of international adoption and assisted reproductive technology—and besides, heterosexuals who are infertile or past the age of reproducing get married all the time.)
Ozzie and Harriet are nowhere in the New Testament either. The biblical Jesus was—in spite of recent efforts of novelists to paint him otherwise—emphatically unmarried. He preached a radical kind of family, a caring community of believers, whose bond in God superseded all blood ties. Leave your families and follow me, Jesus says in the gospels. There will be no marriage in heaven, he says in Matthew. Jesus never mentions homosexuality, but he roundly condemns divorce (leaving a loophole in some cases for the husbands of unfaithful women).
The apostle Paul echoed the Christian Lord's lack of interest in matters of the flesh. For him, celibacy was the Christian ideal, but family stability was the best alternative. Marry if you must, he told his audiences, but do not get divorced. "To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): a wife must not separate from her husband." It probably goes without saying that the phrase "gay marriage" does not appear in the Bible at all.

If the bible doesn't give abundant examples of traditional marriage, then what are the gay-marriage opponents really exercised about? Well, homosexuality, of course—specifically sex between men. Sex between women has never, even in biblical times, raised as much ire. In its entry on "Homosexual Practices," the Anchor Bible Dictionary notes that nowhere in the Bible do its authors refer to sex between women, "possibly because it did not result in true physical 'union' (by male entry)." The Bible does condemn gay male sex in a handful of passages. Twice Leviticus refers to sex between men as "an abomination" (King James version), but these are throwaway lines in a peculiar text given over to codes for living in the ancient Jewish world, a text that devotes verse after verse to treatments for leprosy, cleanliness rituals for menstruating women and the correct way to sacrifice a goat—or a lamb or a turtle dove. Most of us no longer heed Leviticus on haircuts or blood sacrifices; our modern understanding of the world has surpassed its prescriptions. Why would we regard its condemnation of homosexuality with more seriousness than we regard its advice, which is far lengthier, on the best price to pay for a slave?
Paul was tough on homosexuality, though recently progressive scholars have argued that his condemnation of men who "were inflamed with lust for one another" (which he calls "a perversion") is really a critique of the worst kind of wickedness: self-delusion, violence, promiscuity and debauchery. In his book "The Arrogance of Nations," the scholar Neil Elliott argues that Paul is referring in this famous passage to the depravity of the Roman emperors, the craven habits of Nero and Caligula, a reference his audience would have grasped instantly. "Paul is not talking about what we call homosexuality at all," Elliott says. "He's talking about a certain group of people who have done everything in this list. We're not dealing with anything like gay love or gay marriage. We're talking about really, really violent people who meet their end and are judged by God." In any case, one might add, Paul argued more strenuously against divorce—and at least half of the Christians in America disregard that teaching.
Religious objections to gay marriage are rooted not in the Bible at all, then, but in custom and tradition (and, to talk turkey for a minute, a personal discomfort with gay sex that transcends theological argument). Common prayers and rituals reflect our common practice: the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer describes the participants in a marriage as "the man and the woman." But common practice changes—and for the better, as the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. said, "The arc of history is long, but it bends toward justice." The Bible endorses slavery, a practice that Americans now universally consider shameful and barbaric. It recommends the death penalty for adulterers (and in Leviticus, for men who have sex with men, for that matter). It provides conceptual shelter for anti-Semites. A mature view of scriptural authority requires us, as we have in the past, to move beyond literalism. The Bible was written for a world so unlike our own, it's impossible to apply its rules, at face value, to ours.

Marriage, specifically, has evolved so as to be unrecognizable to the wives of Abraham and Jacob. Monogamy became the norm in the Christian world in the sixth century; husbands' frequent enjoyment of mistresses and prostitutes became taboo by the beginning of the 20th. (In the NEWSWEEK POLL, 55 percent of respondents said that married heterosexuals who have sex with someone other than their spouses are more morally objectionable than a gay couple in a committed sexual relationship.) By the mid-19th century, U.S. courts were siding with wives who were the victims of domestic violence, and by the 1970s most states had gotten rid of their "head and master" laws, which gave husbands the right to decide where a family would live and whether a wife would be able to take a job. Today's vision of marriage as a union of equal partners, joined in a relationship both romantic and pragmatic, is, by very recent standards, radical, says Stephanie Coontz, author of "Marriage, a History."
Religious wedding ceremonies have already changed to reflect new conceptions of marriage. Remember when we used to say "man and wife" instead of "husband and wife"? Remember when we stopped using the word "obey"? Even Miss Manners, the voice of tradition and reason, approved in 1997 of that change. "It seems," she wrote, "that dropping 'obey' was a sensible editing of a service that made assumptions about marriage that the society no longer holds."
We cannot look to the Bible as a marriage manual, but we can read it for universal truths as we struggle toward a more just future. The Bible offers inspiration and warning on the subjects of love, marriage, family and community. It speaks eloquently of the crucial role of families in a fair society and the risks we incur to ourselves and our children should we cease trying to bind ourselves together in loving pairs. Gay men like to point to the story of passionate King David and his friend Jonathan, with whom he was "one spirit" and whom he "loved as he loved himself." Conservatives say this is a story about a platonic friendship, but it is also a story about two men who stand up for each other in turbulent times, through violent war and the disapproval of a powerful parent. David rends his clothes at Jonathan's death and, in grieving, writes a song:
I grieve for you, Jonathan my brother;You were very dear to me.Your love for me was wonderful,More wonderful than that of women.
Here, the Bible praises enduring love between men. What Jonathan and David did or did not do in privacy is perhaps best left to history and our own imaginations.
In addition to its praise of friendship and its condemnation of divorce, the Bible gives many examples of marriages that defy convention yet benefit the greater community. The Torah discouraged the ancient Hebrews from marrying outside the tribe, yet Moses himself is married to a foreigner, Zipporah. Queen Esther is married to a non-Jew and, according to legend, saves the Jewish people. Rabbi Arthur Waskow, of the Shalom Center in Philadelphia, believes that Judaism thrives through diversity and inclusion. "I don't think Judaism should or ought to want to leave any portion of the human population outside the religious process," he says. "We should not want to leave [homosexuals] outside the sacred tent." The marriage of Joseph and Mary is also unorthodox (to say the least), a case of an unconventional arrangement accepted by society for the common good. The boy needed two human parents, after all.

In the Christian story, the message of acceptance for all is codified. Jesus reaches out to everyone, especially those on the margins, and brings the whole Christian community into his embrace. The Rev. James Martin, a Jesuit priest and author, cites the story of Jesus revealing himself to the woman at the well— no matter that she had five former husbands and a current boyfriend—as evidence of Christ's all-encompassing love. The great Bible scholar Walter Brueggemann, emeritus professor at Columbia Theological Seminary, quotes the apostle Paul when he looks for biblical support of gay marriage: "There is neither Greek nor Jew, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Jesus Christ." The religious argument for gay marriage, he adds, "is not generally made with reference to particular texts, but with the general conviction that the Bible is bent toward inclusiveness."
The practice of inclusion, even in defiance of social convention, the reaching out to outcasts, the emphasis on togetherness and community over and against chaos, depravity, indifference—all these biblical values argue for gay marriage. If one is for racial equality and the common nature of humanity, then the values of stability, monogamy and family necessarily follow. Terry Davis is the pastor of First Presbyterian Church in Hartford, Conn., and has been presiding over "holy unions" since 1992. "I'm against promiscuity—love ought to be expressed in committed relationships, not through casual sex, and I think the church should recognize the validity of committed same-sex relationships," he says.
Still, very few Jewish or Christian denominations do officially endorse gay marriage, even in the states where it is legal. The practice varies by region, by church or synagogue, even by cleric. More progressive denominations—the United Church of Christ, for example—have agreed to support gay marriage. Other denominations and dioceses will do "holy union" or "blessing" ceremonies, but shy away from the word "marriage" because it is politically explosive. So the frustrating, semantic question remains: should gay people be married in the same, sacramental sense that straight people are? I would argue that they should. If we are all God's children, made in his likeness and image, then to deny access to any sacrament based on sexuality is exactly the same thing as denying it based on skin color—and no serious (or even semiserious) person would argue that. People get married "for their mutual joy," explains the Rev. Chloe Breyer, executive director of the Interfaith Center in New York, quoting the Episcopal marriage ceremony. That's what religious people do: care for each other in spite of difficulty, she adds. In marriage, couples grow closer to God: "Being with one another in community is how you love God. That's what marriage is about."

More basic than theology, though, is human need. We want, as Abraham did, to grow old surrounded by friends and family and to be buried at last peacefully among them. We want, as Jesus taught, to love one another for our own good—and, not to be too grandiose about it, for the good of the world. We want our children to grow up in stable homes. What happens in the bedroom, really, has nothing to do with any of this. My friend the priest James Martin says his favorite Scripture relating to the question of homosexuality is Psalm 139, a song that praises the beauty and imperfection in all of us and that glorifies God's knowledge of our most secret selves: "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." And then he adds that in his heart he believes that if Jesus were alive today, he would reach out especially to the gays and lesbians among us, for "Jesus does not want people to be lonely and sad." Let the priest's prayer be our own.

today was a bad day.................so i woke up and went to go get my dry cleaning......they couldn't find my suit.................i had a wedding today..................so i had to come home and get a wrinkled suit out of the dry cleaning basket and try to steam the wrinkles out. i had to go and buy a dress shirt because mine were dirty and the dry cleaners couldn't find the one i took to be cleaned and come back and get ready to leave................on the way to the wedding i get pulled over by the popo......................then on the phone my boyfriend and i get in a huge fight over something stupid(we made up).................then at the wedding it smelled like poop......................too many cows..................i dint' like leila's friends at the wedding..................then on the way home i had to pull over at a rest stop to potty cause my tum tum started to hurt and then on top of that i get home and i had lost my house keys.......ugh.....going to bed....tomorrow will be a better day

Yay!!!!!! so we did our Christmas concert tonight, but it wasn't a Christmas concert as you may think we sand non Christmas songs because i don't like songs like jingle bells and silent night. but we have one more next week and we are done......and next Friday finishes school 4 the semester. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh and my baby Gucci had a little photo shoot last night here is a picture.......that's what happens when you're up at 3am

westside high school

so i'm sad.....i meant to mention this in the last email and i forgot, but i went and watched westside's christmas concert, and i had a few complaints. i thought the kids did a great job i was proud of all of my kids, but the teacher called it a christmas concert, and you are not supposed to do that it is supposed to be a winter concert, not christmas because it leaves people out and can be offensive to some people. the set up of the concert was also weird, people had to walk through the performance space to get to their seats and that is bad flow. Mrs perkins was there(your surprised right?) she never came to my shows. she is a BITCH and she will rot in hell. I thought that the lady directing was not prepared as they were still setting up sound 15 mins after the show was supposed to start. and lastly my kids didn't smile. i feel they have lost their joy and that makes me sad and i was sad because i missed my kids so much. but they did a great job. and i was proud. i wish i could have stayed and socialized more but i had school the next day. i love you guys. and tiffany it doesn't matter i will sing what ever you want me to i can sing with morgan if that is what you want.

so much to talk about

so i know that it has been a long times since i logged onto this thing but i have been in overdrive. so lets catch up. lets see..........so school is getting a little better. my hip hop group is really good they preformed in a parade and a basketball game they make the school bearable. i got a fish tank it looks nice. benji came to visit this past week which is going to be my excuse we went and saw twilight. it was really good...if i was going to be an vampire i would want to be them they glitter in the sunlight. it was awesome. i'm done Christmas shopping ....yay! oh oh oh and i'm going to see britney in march. it's britney bitch....i'm so excited. and i'm going to dance at the pulse on tour with mia and brian and wade and shane and lorie. i'm really excited about that you should go to www.thepulseontour.com oh well i guess i'll go but i'll write back tomorrow. i really like blogging i need to get back into it

ABAC chorus concert

so tonight i went to see the ABAC chorus concert. it was a little strange but exciting to return to my old stomping ground. I went with my friend Alana. we had a really good time i got to see some of my old teachers tonight to and that is always cool. i wish i was still in college. life was much simpler back then. and i miss singing in a choir myself you know. sometimes you get so used to doing something that you don't realize how much you miss other things in your life. so I've been doing some singing in shows but i miss singing in a group, in a choral setting. Oh well realizing it is the first step to changing right? on another note i got asked to sing in my former student's wedding. and i'm excited about that. On another note my boyfriend and i got in a fight this morning about stupid music rights and laws with that. but after about 15 mins we were over that. we have been dating for a while now and that is what i love about him. he pisses me off on a weekely basis but i can't stay mad at him. it's always over and done with before it ever really gets started. he's great! oh well more later................

OMG

So i did it.... i finally came out to my parents. i totally feel like i have had a 10 ton lady lifted off of my shoulders. my parents were like champs without missing a beat my mom goes well i love you and that doesn't change as long as you are happy that is all that matters. for the first time i finally feel like i have nothing to hide, and i am really happy i have got a great boyfriend that i really do love and i feel like i can express that in the open for the first time. tonight was a great night i wish i had told my parents months ago, but i know everything has it's time and place and tonight was my time i was ready for any outcome and my parents really surprised me. i love them so much! they are friggin awesome!

Big News

Ok so i'm getting nervous. tomorrow is a big day for me because i have decided to take a big step in my life. and i'm getting scared......i'll have to let you know tomorrow if i chicken out i'll keep you posted

I got a day off

OMG...so i got a day off today and i don't know what to do with myself. i can't tell you the last day that i had a day and had nothing to do. it has been great i got up this morning, went and laid on the couch, fell back asleep. watched a life time movie, ate dinner with my granny, called benji and rob, and now i'm back home and i think i may go back to sleep. i know it sounds lazy but i'm ok with that. last night i had a great time with my kids from macon. we went and saw hsm3 and then went for some food. i miss those guys so much. oh well sigourney is planning another get together. i'm currently in the process of planning a new years celebration for my peeps in atl and others, get excited. i am gonna make a concerned effort to get back to blogging regularly it keeps me calm, i think it is like therapy. last weekend was the last weekend of fright fest and that makes me sad i almost cried. i really miss those guys

sorry it's been a while

so last week i was under the weather.....but i did knet to see new kids on the block and wicked and it was halloween and you know that is my fovorite holiday. so i was super busy last week. things are still going well for me, i'm stil happy and have set out a short term goal for myself and plan on sticking to it. so i'm nervous but excited about the possibilities it could open up for me. I still hate my job. but this week i'm under the weather too, but i think it is something different. however i am looking forward to seeing my macon kids this saturday. tekeyah has arranged for us all to meet for dinner and a movie and i'm looking forward to it. so here's to the future.

happy

so i finally feel like my life is getting in order. i have made a life changing decision that i feel will be good for me i just have to get the nerve up to do it now. for the first time in a while i feel like i'm gonna be ok. i've met someone and i'm really happy with them and i feel like life is just on the up hill swing. i'm really excited about this week i have new kids on wed. wicked on Thursday. sixflags on fri sat and sun. and a Halloween party on Saturday. i'm excited i just gotta finish my costume. ugh i've been putting it off. but i'll get it done.

Mixed emotion

so i'm writing to say that i have had a lot of conflicting thoughts lately. not nessarly like i think about one thing and then think something different but i'm thinking things that aren't normally in my personality. i see myself reelvaluating they way i think about things and wanting to do new and scary things. i think that i'm coming out of my shell a little, if you can imagine i have a shell, and i just feel like my life is on the verge of a change, and i'm excited about that. i don't know this my all be bull shit but i've really been thinking a lot about my life lately and have decided there is no day like the present, and no one will make your dreams come true but you. i'm gonna try to make a vow to be more positive and not let everything bother me so much that is my goal.....we will see how long that last.....in other news i'm going to see NKOTB in about 2 weeks. i used to love them. i was like the biggest fan ever. i'm so excited

TEST

so today we have testing at our school. which means i have to sit in the gym for 2 hours while we listen to not one but 2 motivational speakers. Ugh. but i guess ti could be worse. yesterday i cut my grass, i know right, and then took a nap. i needed to clean my hose last night but did not wake up until 6 this morning, so i just threw everything in the spare bedroom. (i have a guy coming today to hook up the cable) i just didn't want him to think i was nasty you know. so now just the spare room is nasty. i can't wait for the weekend. i have 2 more days b4 i'm up in atl at 6flags. however if you go to sfog.net there are forums and they are making some really nasty comments about our show. i say if you don't have anything better to do with your life than to get on line and bitch about a show that people are busting their ass for then your life sucks and you are a looser. there i said it .

miss you guys

S0 Sad times. i miss my summer cast. they were all super fun and i just really miss them. here we are pictured (sam and tedra and brad not pictured) but it just seemed like we were a family we just all seemed to click and i miss them all. i love my new cast but i really miss these peoples. I love you guys!

XANADU

So I feel like we have not yet talked about the wonders of Xanadu. Now this is the story of a beautiful muse that comes to earth to inspire the very talented Mr. Jackson to open a roller disco. easy plot not much to it but it is outrageous. I feel like it is great and i really want to see it live. now you can go on youtube and see lots of clips, so this week i have devoted my life to studying this musical. i feel like the best part about it though is the lead guy. he is really awesome. Mr. Jackson was also in alter boys which i have decided to devote next week of my life to. he also took over Adam's roll in Aida. He is probably my new fav Broadway star, sorry Idena. The next really cool thing about this musical is that it has a Greek chorus. Now i LOVE a Greek chorus. they are always so random, like the chorus in legally blonde the musical, which by the way i heard the recording of Baily doing so much better, and it was not as good as laura bell's. so back to the wonders that is Xanadu. you have to also love the costumes. short shorts and metalic spandex with big hair, now if any of you know me you know every year for Halloween i try to work in some short of booty short and this seems to have caught on in this musical. i feel like i was destined to be in it. oh well maybe one day, but you have got to go check it out on youtube, and i even went to the Broadway web site and bought the T-shirt, i couldn't help myself.

I'm outta here

so not a lot to report. however, i did get the aggravation up today to pack all my shit and load it in my car from school. i hate this place, so why should i stay the kids are spoiled brats who will never make it in the real world, so as soon as i find a job I'm gone. YAY! now i just gotta find a job, i really want to perform, but i may have to take something else in the mean time

So today i was doing a little bit of Internet perusing to help find my friend rob a good Halloween costume. Now Rob does not like to buy costumes but he likes to make them, so i cam across this particular photo of some one's Halloween costume, and thought it was funny. I just hope he doesn't get a paper cut, because that would suck! but i think that rob decided to go with the costume of a butterfly. i feel like that will be funny as well and maybe not as dangerous. but this guy was clever. i wonder if he could use his costume as a table for that drink, because if he could then i feel like the costume would be convient

this weekend's horrors

Ok, so this weekend was a lot of fun but not without it's horrors. Thursday night we had our first show for a real audience. well not a real real audience but friends and family. it went pretty well i guess but all of our lights and sounds were not working correctly. Friday night. went well........however, the lights were still not right and the sound guy sucks. he can't remember to turn on all of our mics when we have lines to say. i'm like just turn them all on and then you don't have to fool with it. Saturday. our lights messed up. special effects messed up...lost a mic....someone Else's mic broke...fire alarm went off...part of the set broke...fight broke out between cast mates(it was nasty too)....Sunday one of our cast members didn't come to work because she didn't feel well. i say who the FUCK cares....get your ass to work. as a performer no one cares if you are sick, you go on regardless. and being that there are no understudies or swings, we didn't get to have any shows, and i fell like if im gonna drive my fat ass 4 hours there and 4 hours back we need to have shows and it is disappointing when someone is too sick/lazy to bring their ass to work. but on a good note. yesterday didn't suck. i have got 12 days now before my first concert with these kids and i'm scared as shit. i guess we can only cross our fingers. it is what it is.

Oh....and do you remember "make me a supermodel" i loved it and i saw Ronnie on a magazine yesterday and it brought back good memories. he should have won. but oh well....he will still make lots of money.....

Welcome to my nightmare!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So as if things couldn't get worse..........i was having a bad day yesterday if you couldn't tell by my blog. so i decided to go straight home take some sleeping pills and go right to bed. i just figured that tomorrow had to be better and i woke up this morning and guess what...i didn't feel any better. so on the way to work Benji called me and told me that during Tech run last night our set caught on fire due to faulty wiring. so that started off the day on a great path. when i got to school....(dum dum dum Scary music) my room was a mess. trash was on the ground...my risers were all messed up. my door was open. all because i got kicked out of my room to have a blood drive. Why are we having blood drives at school.. they are not educational. i'm over it. i wish this was just all a bad dream and i would wake up to find it was all over, but instead i'm forced to relive the same depressing day over and over again...WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE!!!!

Why Don't People Ask

So i'm so over this school. today i find out my chorus room was given away for a blood drive and my middle school makeshift room was given away for pictures. why can't they just ask. i would have politely said no but they could have asked. i hate this shit. also as some of you may have known my ass broke my phone two weeks ago. well i had a new one sent to me and i wasn't home when they tried to make the delivery so they sent it back to verizon. UGH...my life... but on a good note my show opens Friday night at 6flags and i'm excited about that and nervous because i'm missing tech week, so i keep having this fear my mic won't be turned on in the right places. but i'm sure it will be on if not i'll just crawl the sound guys ass. sorry the blogs have been so negative this week i guess i'm just in that type of mood

it's been a bad day again

sorry for not writing yesterday....i was so tired from the rehearsals in atl that i didn't do much of anything. today started off poorly. i found out that a lot of bad things happened last night at 6 flags that made me very upset. and when i voiced them to someone right after just wanting to vent they didn't seem to really care so that hurt a little, but you know that is how it works. on a better note i finished the book of darkness yesterday(spell book for my 6 flags show) and it looks really good. so that is exciting. but i feel as if this weekend which i was looking forward to is not gonna be a good one. i'm hoping im wrong, but i'm worried

NO DAY BUT TODAY

So last night i went and watched RENT at the movie theaters. It was really good. it was a recording of the last show that is only being played for four days. I feel like everyone should go and see it because it is the end of an era and it deserves to be observed and respected

here is a run down

Tickets: $20.00--i know right real expensive for a movie

Videography: not the best but you know u deal with what you got

Roger: A little old, a little chunky, and weird looking lips but a good singer

Mimi: Stole the show. she was probably the best I've seen. she had a great voice and did the part very well.

Mark: Almost sounded just like Anthony. but way better looking

Maureen: Good. looked and sounded at times just like Idena

Johanne: Same from the movie. she was good. but she got herself a new weave

Tom Collins: Good singer. ugly to look at

Angel: Funny great actor. sometimes sounded like a man

Benny: Was missing a tooth and i was like can he not get that fixed?

overall outstanding though..I'm glad i got to see it. i may have shed a tear or too.

best part-----my grandma went to watch it with me because I'm in redneck hell and have no friends down here and she did not like it. but you know it just wasn't her thing. she did like "that America song"(what you own). but she was funny

So i think people are funny.... have you ever known someone who takes something little and blows it up to a full blown sickness...for instance i know this guy who got a red mark on his leg and he was like "do you think it is cancer?" no i don't think it is cancer i think you were wearing cheap shoes. i mean you can't help but laugh when someone says something like that. or how about i know this person who had her eye get red and she was like "do you think I'm going blind?" No...you need new contacts those have been in your eye for like 4 months...People are so funny!

------new subject-------

so yesterday was a good day. Kaitlyn Boone(one of my old students) came to visit me at school. it was really great to see her. She really did make my day. You know I'm proud that i have so many students majoring in music. it makes me feel like i did make at least a little difference in their lives. i'm proud of all my kids but i know of at least 8 in the past 3 years to go and major in music. that is a pretty big number.

-----new subject-----

so i decided my life needed some sort of routine. i mean right now i work and sleep. and i need more substance than that so i joined a new tanning salon...it is called Jamaica me tan. cheesy i know but the girl behind the counter seemed nice enough and at least they have lights in the tanning booth unlike the gyms. and she was too funny yesterday. she was like are you thirsty? we sell can cokes and things in that little fridge for 75Cents. first of all what tanning salon does this? but she was nice so i just said no thanks. plus she was real tan and i was jealous. so I'm on the way to getting my mexican on

-----New subject-----

so I'm getting my hair colored black tomorrow for this show I'm in. now i have had lots of hair colors but usually with some sort of blond mixed in but all black? I'm a little scared. but i figured I'll try to express my emo side. we'll see how it turns out

calling headquarters

So I need to tell you that i, as you may know am an avid fan of McDonald's Breakfast. I feel like they have got it going on in this area. I have grown madly in love with the Sausage egg and cheese biscuit. I may even go almost every Monday, Tuesday, wed, Thurs, Friday, sat, and Sunday, to get one. i know what your thinking...your a fat ass, and yes it's true but i love them. they are like my crack addiction. i go through withdrawals. Now what you may not know is that i have been doing this routine for almost 2 years. but anyway that is not the point. so as i have moved here the search to find this great fast food establishment has been on. now i decided the most convenient location for my life would be the McDonald's in Nashville Ga. This was a poor decision. Everyday i go and my sandwich is not wrapped properly in the festive tissue stuff they use. they are either out of jelly, large cups, lids, or Dr. pepper every day. they have never had everything i asked for. So yesterday i went and ordered my stuff and they say. "We out of Dr. Pepper" so i say OK sprite then. so i get to the window and ask for grape jelly and she says"we out of jelly" so i was fed up with this whole process so i asked her "who orders your food" and she said the managers do so i told her that they obviously weren't doing their job because they were always out of something...and so then she says(no Lie) "well most of the time people are just too lazy to go get the stuff out of the back, but i can almost always go and find it back there" (can you believe that) so i said "well do you have jelly in the back and just ain't willing to go get it or are you really out" and she said no "we out today" so i asked her for the manager's number and she gave me a disconnected number. so this morning i go online and call corporate. and tell them all about the bad McDonald's when she tells me that she is so sorry that they have had lots of problems with this place and that i would receive a gift certificate in the mail. and this is the first day in a long time i have not had that buttery breakfast goodness . I'm a little shaky right now but i feel like this bad service may have broken my addiction....

Zzzzzzz

OMG...I'm am so tired today. We had this killer rehearsal this yesterday in Atl. and my body totally feels the effects of it today. I'm only 26 i shouldn't feel this old. my arms hurt and my back hurts...well not really hurts just sore. but i just keep telling myself I'm gonna have huge biceps after fright fest from picking everyone up. that's encouraging right? sorry this blog is not more excited, but i don't have the energy today... ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

The New internet

So as you may or may not know I'm not real Internet savvy... but i have discovered the new YOUTUBE. it's way better. it's better quality and faster. it's called MEGAVIDEO.com it truly is worth the look see. now Lets talk about the new facebook. I hate it. there we are done. i feel like that is all there is to say. I mean can anyone find anything on it. i have no idea where my wall is or how to get to it. i have my flair, but i do i check new flair. i mean it wasn't broke why go and "FIX" it? so i felt the need to tell everyone that i feel like it sucks ass...And speaking of facebook i think it is really shady to send important messages over facebook like "hey i can't go on the date with you tonight" or "hey your mom died" i feel if you are one of these people who do this then you should be smacked in the face. i mean pick up the damn phone. and i have decided that my new song for the week is Holding Out For A Hero . there isn't any real reason behind this, but i just rediscovered it and found a new love for it within my self. One more thing. not related at all. Do you ever think it is OK to let someone else use your voice. i say hell no but so many other people see no problem with this. i mean do we not remember the milli vanilli stuff from back in the day? i don't know i just have real problems with this. i would like to see what everyone else thinks

Have you ever wished you had super hero powers? I mean really...i think this would be really cool. when on the way to work i began to wonder what would my superhero power be? and i decided i would like to fly and be invisible and have super strength etc., but i think what i would like most would be the ability to shoot laser beams out of my eyes. Now not some crazy wimpy ass beam but I'm talking beams of mass destruction. i also would not want to be like cyclops who has to wear those stupid glasses all the time but i would like to be able to turn them on and off. I mean after all i do have pretty eyes! I came to this conclusion this morning when i, as usual, was behind some slow ass country person . She was going like 25 miles an hour and as you may or may not know i usually am running a little late. so as i was sitting there i began to think wouldn't it be cool if i could kill her with my eyes. Now i know this sounds mean but why not right. i mean i don't know her and i feel like if you can kill with your eyes no one is going to get in your way. OK well maybe not kill her you make me feel bad maybe just catch her car on fire of blow out a tire. But my question now is would i have to stick my head out of the window while driving? i mean would my laser eyes melt the glass in my car forcing me to use them with my head out the window and if so that would mess up my hair. why does everything have to have a draw back? but i also thought it could come in handy in lots of places like at school or at wal-mart when people have buggies with like 500 things in them, i know you have seen what I'm talking about at the first of the month, and they get in the 20 items or less lane. i hate that i feel like they could deserve to get lasered. Or how about people that are ingorant. lets laser them. don't you feel like the world would be a "better place for you and for me and the entire human race"? or you know i feel like if Madonna was president it would also be a better place for everybody...And speaking of Madonna have you seen her lately? She is looking too skinny.. i feel like she needs a cake....no i know she is into the palates and like fergie is working on her fitness and wants us to be her witness but come on Madge get a cake...make it a carrot cake if you want to be healthy but please eat I'm worried...i mean it is gonna be hard to out live Cher and you are gonna need some carbs in your life to do that! and Cher...Poor Poor Cher bless her heart i saw her in the wal-mart line last week and she just keeps trying to "turn back time" but she is beginning to look a little like crazy ass Micheal Jackson...and all i can saw to that is EWW.

9-17-08

How does one find the strength to go on when they feel defeated? if the world is in shambles around you where does one find the strength, support, or knowledge to know what pieces to pick up? and if that's not possible when does someone know just to drop their losses and move on!

Small Town Blues

So let me just start today by saying that i don't understand it. I don't know why anyone would ever choose to live in a small town. there is nothing convenient about living in a small town. There are not suitable shopping locations, gyms, restaurants, theaters, attractions, etc. For example:
Shopping: My phone broke yesterday and I called my friend Justin who works for Verizon, and come to find out(not to my surprise)there isn't a Verizon store for over 40 miles. WTF.
Gyms: So maybe i got spoiled at my last gym...they had classes all day long, tanning beds, a smoothie store, a cardio movie theater, lots of weight machines, all their cardio equipment had its very own personal flat screen TV so you can watch whatever you chose, and a really nice locker room. this new gym's equipment looks like it came from 1922. all the machines have pads and cushions missing. some of the parts are rusted. there are only 2 TVs in the cardio room. the tanning bed area's are self serve meaning you have to sanitize it yourself. oh and there aren't any lights in the tanning rooms. you have to turn on the bed to see. they only offer two cardio classes a day, and you never know what they are going to be. you just show up and see what the instructor decided to teach that day. Best part... so i took a step class there and went to get my step and it was homemade out of 2x4's and plywood. shut up i know right! I'm over it.
Restaurants: We got a red lobster, golden Corale, Sonny's, zaxby's, arbys, McDonald's, taco bell, subway, Krystal's, loco's and Moe's. that's it. there isn't anywhere nice to eat here. Fast food for days. that's why every one here is fat!
Theaters: there is a carmike cinema 6 (6 screens that's it ) No live theaters to report.
Attractions:Sometimes they have a tractor pull..what the hell am i gonna do there? Oh and there are high school football games. I think not!
-------almost forgot-----
On the way to work. I am frequently late because i get stopped by a train, or a tractor, or some old ass person driving slow, or (and here is my fav.)livestock in the road. i kid you not... i have been late twice because cows or horses were just chillin in the road.
And this is just the icing on the cake---then there are the people...these are some of the dumbest people i have ever seen. they are so redneck and country all they want to do is...well i don't know what they want to do...In fact i never see them doing anything. i just don't understand having no future aspirations to get out of here. to do somewhere. to be something. it is just beyond me. I'm here do to a series of unfortunate circumstances, but be rest assured I'm looking for ways to rectify the situation as we speak.If i have offended anyone I'm sorry, but that is my rant for the day

I DON'T CARE

This weekend going into today has been a semi disappointing time....I First realized just how lazy people could be when i was in rehearsal this weekend. It gets to be really frustrating when you look around and realize that everyone is not giving something 100% and you are giving it 110%. I was always taught by my mom, if you're going to do something then do it right. and always give it all you've got. I guess every one's mother did not subscribe to the same way of thinking. I try to walk into every situation and give it all I've got but sometimes that gets tiffed by others not caring or giving half as much as I do. So the phrase I DON'T CARE was sort of the theme for a lot of people this weekend or at least that is what i received from them. Then today at work that same motto seemed to apply. I gave a project to my students where they had to select a musical of their choice. pick a character of their choice and tell the story of the musical. there had to be a musical number involved in the project somewhere and that was all the rules that i put on the project... i thought it would be fun... i wanted them to have fun with it and be creative and now i am two classes into the day and only two kids decided to do it... what an easy grade. my kids in Macon would have tore this up. but then again they cared! i don't know.. tomorrow will be a new day!!!

Excitement

So i know that no one will care about this but me, but I'm excited about it so i thought i would share it with my loyal readers. i just received a phone call telling me that the set for my new show just got in and it looked like something from scooby-doo the musical... not this may sound a little strange to you but it got me real excited....i love scooby doo.... I'm seeing lots of purple and swamp plants. I'll have to give you guys an update when i actually see it for myself. _____NEW________TOPIC_______

Don't you hate when people think that they can intimidate you...i mean i always find it funny when people get loud and in your face. that's not intimidating. all that says is that you have a little penis and your breath stinks... i mean really....today has been a good day... i don't really have a lot to talk about I'm just gonna leave you wtih this quote..."scoo--bee---doo--bee-doo where are you? we got a lot to do now....."

Life Revelation

So as i was talking to a friend the other night and giving my daddy Trey advice and i made some life revelations of my own....The first being that someone cannot hurt you unless you allow them to hurt you! I feel like this is true in all areas of life. It is up to us and us alone to stand up for our selves and take control. we are in control of our feelings and we are the ones who allow others to hurt us. the 2nd being you must first love yourself...the wise Rupaul one said "if you can't love yourself how in the hell is someone else going to?" This statement is totally true. 3rd...you and you alone are in control of your destiny...Westside High School had a motto that said "failure is not an option" BULL SHIT...you can always choose to fail. everyday we are face with challenges. they are often not great but it's how you cope and deal with those challenges that make you successful or a failure. 4th Life is SHIT...I hate the expressions "things will get better" "the only way out is up" "the sun will come out tomorrow"...i think these are crap...Instead i think we should say "Tomorrow is a new day!" this statement is true. now tomorrow probally will be 90% shit, but it is the 10% that is not that is worth looking forward to. i feel like we all too often, me included, concentrate on the bad and hoard over it when we should instead cherish the good times, because they are far to short and to far apart not to enjoy them and if we are always caught up on the bad the good will pass us by. I think that at the end of the day if you can just say that you stayed afloat and didn't sink in the never ending hole that "the only way out is up" then you can say i was a success. After all if we didn't have all the bad then we wouldn't know just how great and awesome the good was...lastly i have learned in my existence here on this earth, and this is also a new revelation as of around April of last year, that it doesn't matter how much you do for someone. it doesn't matter if you do without so that they can have. it doesn't matter, it just doesn't matter. in this life you must place yourself on a pedestal. do what makes you happy. take hold of your future. go after your dreams. you can't live for others because if you do at the end of your life you will have never lived yourself and you will be left with nothing from always giving and the ones you gave it all to won't appreciate it because they will not have worked for it. and in life if it is worth having, then it is worth working for. So you have to do for you...you have to live for you...you have to make "you" happy....and in the process if others have benefited then that's great but you have to be your number one priority. For a long time that has not been the case in my life, but I'm working on changing theses things, and i hope you will re-evaluate your life and make sure you are living for you not your job... not your family..but for you...i feel like everyone will appreciate you and love you more with this new found love and respect for yourself! sorry for the grammer and run-on sentences...it's just how it came out. :-)

What Society Needs to Know!

I Feel like the media sometimes lets us down...just yesterday i was in class and my students were telling me about this lady whos butt grew onto a toilet seat. At first i found this odd, but i chose to check it out. As i was doing my research i found this to be true. The artical said that she had been on the toilet for three years and her butt skin had grown into the fibers of the seat and had grown around the seat causing her to not to be able to get up. The artical went on to say that her boyfriend had been bringing her food. First of all....how does she still have this boyfriend. this is nasty. i feel like no matter how ugly he is he can do better. second of all i had a couple of problems with the artical. 1) how did she wipe her butt when she went to the bathroom. it seems to me that with all that poop not getting wiped off and pee mixing with it, she would have some sort of infection...2)you know how when someone in the hospital is not moved they get bed sores...well did she have bed sores and if so are they called toilet sores. i mean i don't know the artical didn't say. and then i wondered 3) how did she sleep? did she have a pillow? 4) did she smell? i mean i'm sure she did but the artical didn't say...i just feel like we the people need more information. i'm sure if i had thought more on the subject i would have come up with more questions, but these just hit me right off. speaking of poop...today i was on facebook and noticed a piece of flair that said ipoop. it was like an ipod ad but had a guy sitting on the tiolet on that red background with a white cord going to the toilet. i feel like this may have been a little much, but i sent it to a friend anyway.

Haterade

So I know that everyone expects this blog so here goes. Ok so i must confess i have been slacking on my Britney number one fan responsibilities. Now as many of you may know, we go way back. like old school circa 1999. anywho, I did not get to see her on the VMA's Sunday night because i was dancing in platform boots in ATL. (hehe... i know you wanna know right....well you will have to come to fright fest at 6 flags to find out) but i was very upset when i did my research yesterday to find out that people were being nasty about it. Now I'm not trying to sound like that freak on you tube "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE"....but from what i saw she looked good. she wasn't bald... her tracks were in right this time. she didn't make a mess of a performance like last year(Sorry Britney it's true), and i feel like she is getting her life together. so i have to say Good For Britney, Good For Her! I feel like Mrs. Spears is on the way to being a slave for us again, to being up against the music. so good for you Britney. Now as for me.... i got lots of sleep last night..YAY!!! i totally needed it. i was pooped. i didn't have to poop, but i was pooped. Today has been OK so far. and i think i found a new audition song from listening to my Big Fat Broadway on the radio. Gotta love Seth!!!

Triangle in a circular hole

So this is my first blog. I feel like i have so much to say today. Sometimes in life you just look around and know and understand that you just don't belong. I currently find myself in a job and a location where i just don't feel like i belong. The people here are super nice, but I'm constantly like a triangle trying to fit into a circular hole. The culture i am currently in, that is if you can call it a culture is like the BLACK HOLE!!! I feel like this is the place farm equipment comes to die. never to return again!!! I feel so sorry for the people who live here. like i said they are super nice, but i sometimes feel as if they have no clue. it's like that movie the village where they never step out of the circle. they have their own dialect, and definitely their own way of thinking. The people i feel the sorriest for are the kids. they can't help what this Town is doing to them. this place is a vicious cycle. the kids for the most part have no aspirations to get out or do anything different from their parents. and i believe that it is simply because they haven't experienced anything more, and that is not their fault but i blame the parents for not exposing their kids to more. I just leave everyday feeling a little depressed that I'm trapped here and totally sad for the kids and people who will never know any better. on a lighter note my favorite holiday Halloween is coming up in a little over a month. I've already started working on my costume. it's gonna be magnifierce!!!!